Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Elementary behavior in the workplace

Have you ever found yourself facing a situation as an adult that you would almost swear you are still in elementary school?  I don’t find myself in many of these situations but on occasion I do.  I try to take the mature stance with the issue I face but I have concluded that it sometimes doesn’t pay to take that attitude.

Let me start by saying I have heard from many people, and outlets that office managers don’t like to act like babysitters or be referees.  (This could be any adult for that matter.)  I know I appreciate mature behavior from others.  Office superiors should deal with people as adults, however; sometimes they encounter elementary instances that they have to manage.  

Therefore I usually try to practice traditionally taught behaviors like ‘If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say nothing at all.’  Another thing I try not to do is use excesses.  Time and again I have heard people say that they tire of hearing them and it doesn’t affect how they will deal with the situation.  Recently I have found out that acting like an adult doesn’t pay off. 

You have heard the saying, ‘The squeaky wheel gets the grease’, that’s because it is true.  I found myself in this situation the other day at work.  I became frustrated and angry with a co-worker who acted rather selfishly instead of employing traditional values such as ‘team work’ and ‘taking care of the company’.  I admit I was storming around a bit and bumped into her.  I didn’t immediately say ‘excuse me’ or ’sorry’.  Instead there was some tattle tailing and accusations that happened.  I didn’t use any excuse because I felt the boss doesn’t want to hear it.  Besides, I was trying to act mature about it and move on.  However, in light of the situation, because I didn’t defend myself, I’ve been treated by many in the office like the evil person in the situation. 

If I would have defended myself, I might be respected more because then others might consider my perspective instead of siding with my co-worker.  Here I am trying to be mature about the situation but I find myself facing backlash from everyone in the office because I dropped it yet the other person didn’t. I had intentions of still apologizing but her continued behavior made me feel like I shouldn’t.  Since she was the squeaky wheel there was more empathy for her.  Her vocalization, and continuing petty behaviors presents me with a problem.   Her immature action and lack of good work ethic affects my job and what people think of me despite my continuous positive job performance.  I admit that I am human and make my share of mistakes but overall I am a valuable employee. 

If I condone immature behavior as an adult then I am not promoting self-sufficiency and wise decision-making for those who I may influence including my child(ren).  This is a value that is held personally and socially.  On the other hand, as I have learned, that at times those elementary reactions do pay off in the workplace.  It is better to practice selflessness so that we take care of others and hopefully it would be done likewise.  However, selfishness in certain instances seem to pay off at times.  I have always hated office politics and try not to take part in them.  However, if you don’t play by the rules of office politics your own position suffers.  Thus, I’m at an impasse. 

As a parent, I have no good advice for my child who may find themselves in this situation.  In my heart and my gut I would recommend mature behavior, but in life where others don’t practice it, it doesn’t pay off. 

I can only hope that the person who’s placed in the middle values the same things I do and recognizes and appreciates it likewise.  Will I continue to behave the same way?  Should I take my cue from others and follow?  Should I lead by example yet my attitude may pay off?  I don’t know.  I can only pray about it and live for the things that really matter in my life.

[Via http://mommysjibberjabber.wordpress.com]

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